Ah, winter.

Ah, dark, rainy days.

Ah, me trying to limit outside news to balance my interior health.

Um, cut to me making small talk with a neighbor about how my daughter eggs me on to look at the positive instead of focusing on world news. Then the neighbor saying, “That’s privilege.”

And me stepping back, rushing inside and knowing she’s both right and wrong. Because yes, I need to do what I can to make positive change. But no, I can’t do it if I’m curled up in a ball unable to function.

This is why right now is hard. There’s a guy in the White House bullying people with tweets. He’s effective. The news makes me want to curl up into a ball and stretch my limbs only when spring arrives. There’s a state of stress that covers every one of us when the one who has the most power in our country lashes out at us via tweets and executive orders. Some of us rise up fast and act. Some of us curl up into a ball before knowing we need to make ourselves tea, stretch, meditate, take care of ourselves and our family and pick a few to-do items that may make a small difference in the world outside of our home sphere.

Jesus, I can’t attack myself and function. I’m not sure why some of us are more sensitive than others, only that many of my artistic friends are like me. We are taking breaks from some forms of media, making tea, encircling tress with lights and focusing on our breathing. I’m privileged; yes, it’s true. I’m also doing my best. One of the quotes I found this fall reminds me that my best is enough:

“There is always something to do. There are hungry people to feed, naked people to clothe, sick people to comfort and make well. And while I don’t expect you to save the world I do think it’s not asking too much for you to love those with whom you sleep, share the happiness of those whom you call friend, engage those among you who are visionary and remove from your life those who offer you depression, despair and disrespect.” –Nikki Giovanni